Sightings

The Heterosexual Knitting Male once thundered across the land. But with the rise of the industrial revolution, the Heterosexual Knitting Male was driven from his home and forced to work in office buildings and to abandon his craft. Nearly extinct, sightings of the Heterosexual Knitting Male have been documented in print knitting magazines and online. But few knitters have actually seen one for themselves.

Until Yesterday. . . When several Connecticut knitters thought they spied one in two different Borders Bookstores.

I expect that, much like ornithologists Arkansas, Connecticut knitters will flock to the handcraft sections of Borders to experience a Heterosexual Knitting Male for themselves. They will camouflage themselves with copies of People and TV Guide (so as not to attract attention to themselves) and give the call of the knitter: "Worsted wool! Worsted wool! Click, click, click!" If it IS a Heterosexual Knitting Male, he will give the reply, "Noro! Purl, purl, Noro!"

But, alas, no reply will come. Their quarry was no Heterosexual Knitting Male. 'Twas but a Knitter's Husband (which are not at all rare) dutifully purchasing the current Knitter's for his wife, who was busy shoe shopping nearby. Disappointment again.

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John informs me that if he ever wanted to cheat on me, all he would have to do is show up in the knitting section of Borders again with one of our children